Massive stadium-ready rockers that start or end with gentle contemplative pianos have been a monster-hit staple for decades: The Beatles' "Hey Jude," Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody," Guns N' Roses' "November Rain," and now Jordan Maye's "Deranged" — and for good reason. Each of these songs wants to take us on a journey, and Maye's journey is one of mental strife and torment.
"Deranged" meshes hard rock vocals with warbly organs and crunchy, psych guitars. The drums build in intensity as we follow her through some sort of breakdown. She sings, "kicking walls and slamming ground / I listen to that ringing sound / The books are filled with fire when you crack ‘em open / Throwing punches, screaming cries / Condensation in my eyes / My bones are like my mind, they’re surely broken." The music breaks for a contemplative moment and she tenderly sings, "The angels float above my head / I pray that they take me away" before the driving percussion leads us back into the chaos.
Maye isn't afraid to confront her darkest thoughts and openly share them with us. There's a bravery here in her candidness. Maye is a student at Berklee College of Music and a trans woman. The alarmingly high rates of depression and anxiety among trans youth is well documented. This is a song for those going through something similar, so they know they aren't alone in these feelings, and a window of empathy for the rest of us. Maye shows us a secret place that few people are allowed in, and it can't be easy.
The songs she's previously released, "Hush" and "One Year After" also deal with pain and loss, while "Tarot" gives us hope with the lyrics, "And children have to pay the debt / To time by aging all their life /By finding meaning in the strife / Of manhood, of womanhood / Of fruitful trees."
I want there to be hope for Maye and people that feel like they're suffering. We've all been at a place in our lives where we've felt "Deranged," but Maye's song viscerally takes us to a specific time and place, as the best poets do.
Her debut album Creation of Jordan Maye is out August 23rd.
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